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This American’s hilarious thread about weird British traits went viral because she knows us so well

June 17, 2022 by humorouz Leave a Comment

Sometimes it takes an outsider to come in and spot the weird stuff that you do, and this is exactly what an American who’s been living in the UK for 10 years has just done to the British.

Jessica Rose – @jesslynnrose on Twitter – took a bit of time out to list all of the things she still found ‘weird as hell’ about the UK nearly 10 years after she arrived here.

Jessica is from the US and came here after living in Japan.

‘I now live in Birmingham which I am firmly convinced is the nicest city in the world to live in,’ she says. ‘I work in tech and have very ugly cats.’

And here’s her take on living in the UK, 10 years in, which has just gone wildly viral on Twitter because it’s very funny and so, so true.

1.

I have been living in the UK for 10 years this year. Please have a short thread of things that are still weird as hell to me 🧵

— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021

2.

British people have rising intonation when they say “bye” on the phone so it’s a bouncy “byYEEE” and why do you people do that?

— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021

3.

Please why beans on toast there are so many other lazy foods that are actually good why is this a thing?

— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021

4.

People here put fish fingers (yes they mean fish sticks but I’m fine w the name part) in sandwiches which is just…why.

— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021

5.

Britishes pronounce “patronise” pat-row-nize but pronounce “patron” in the expected way and this divergence distresses me.

— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021

6.

Britishes call their fanciest private schools public schools which is weird and confusing, likely by design.

— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021

7.

British beaches are often just banks of sharp stones by the water and people here excitedly go to them on purpose. When you get there you can buy disappointing candy sticks called rock and seagulls will fight you.

— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021

8.

They have proms here but they mean outdoor classic music things, not a school dance. Except now sometimes they have school dances called proms. I give up.

— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021

9.

Signing “sincerely” in an email means “fuck off”.

Saying “fuck off” in a pub means “I appreciate our friendship” 98% the time and 2% of the time it is a precursor to violence.

— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021

10.

If there is a mistake at a coffee shop or restaurant British people will complain to everyone but the people who could fix the issue and if asked by those people will report that everything is fine.

— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021

11.

On getting off a bus saying thank you to the driver is optional until the person leaving in front of you says thank you. Then you are legally required to say it. So is everyone behind you.

— Jessica Rose (@jesslynnrose) February 4, 2021

The post This American’s hilarious thread about weird British traits went viral because she knows us so well appeared first on The Poke.

Filed Under: Articles - World

Senator Josh Hawley Gets the Last Laugh on Cancel Culture | The Stream

June 17, 2022 by humorouz Leave a Comment

Last October, Simon & Schuster, a giant in the publishing industry, announced it would be releasing Senator Josh Hawley’s book titled The Tyranny of Big Tech. As reported by AP News, Hawley had frequently criticized the various social media giants “for everything from alleged anti-conservative bias to monopolistic control of the online market.”

As Hawley explained, “At a time when these platforms are determining elections, banning inconvenient political views, lining politicians’ pockets with hundreds of millions of dollars, and addicting our kids to screens, I want to draw attention to the robber barons of the modern era. This is the fight to recover America’s populist democracy. That is why I am writing this book.”

Simon & Schuster: We “Cannot Support Senator Hawley”

The book was targeted for a June 2021 release date, but on January 7, 2021, one day after the storming of the Capitol, which was also one day after Sen. Hawley called for an investigation into claims of election fraud, Simon & Schuster released this statement:

After witnessing the disturbing, deadly insurrection that took place on Wednesday in Washington, D.C., Simon & Schuster has decided to cancel publication of Senator Josh Hawley’s forthcoming book, THE TYRANNY OF BIG TECH. We did not come to this decision lightly. As a publisher it will always be our mission to amplify a variety of voices and viewpoints: at the same time we take seriously our larger public responsibility as citizens, and cannot support Senator Hawley after his role in what became a dangerous threat to our democracy and freedom.

So, a book exposing the tyranny of big tech got canceled because of a knee-jerk reaction to Hawley’s actions on January 6, actions that were neither dangerous nor unpatriotic. And this happened at the same time that President Trump’s Twitter account was being shut down for life, along with many other conservative accounts being purged. Oh, the irony!

But the story doesn’t end there.

Now a Bestseller

On January 18, 2021, Regnery Books, one of the conservative publishing giants, announced that their company would now be publishing the senator’s book, with a release date of May 2021.

As Mollie Hemingway reported on The Federalist, “Simon and Schuster canceled the book Jan. 7, quickly caving to a pressure campaign organized by leftist activists and making the Missouri Republican one of the highest-profile victims of cancel culture.”

Said Thomas Spence, the president of Regnery Books, “It’s discouraging to see them cower before the ‘woke mob,’ as Senator Hawley correctly calls it. Regnery is proud to stand in the breach with him. And the warning in his book about censorship obviously couldn’t be more urgent.”

The more the culture tries to silence us, the more we will get our message out.

Not surprisingly, interest in the book exploded after its cancellation and reinstatement, and now, it has debuted on Amazon as one of the top books in the nation.

Simon & Schuster inadvertently confirmed Hawley’s concerns, spiking interest in his book rather than drawing attention away from it.

This is how cancel culture backfires. This is how attempts to silence us can ultimately amplify our voices. This is how we push back.

But this is not the first time this has happened, nor will it be the last.

When Prof. Peterson Became an Overnight Sensation for Resisting Forced Speech

Were you aware of Prof. Jordan Peterson before he suddenly skyrocketed to international fame? Did you know of him when he was a respected but relatively obscure psychology professor at the University of Toronto? Were you one of the rare readers who waded through his serious, academic work, Maps of Meaning: The Architecture of Belief, which took him thirteen years to write and which was published in 1999?

That was all before 2016, when quite suddenly and unexpectedly, Peterson became an international bestselling author and a man hailed by some as “the most influential public intellectual in the Western world right now.” What launched him into worldwide fame?

Please Support The Stream: Equipping Christians to Think Clearly About the Political, Economic and Moral Issues of Our Day.

It was when he refused to bow down to the spirit of political correctness in Canada, specifically, being forced to use certain pronouns when addressing transgender-identified people.

When he was asked on TV what would happen if the government required him to comply with its new speech rules, he answered, “If they fine me, I won’t pay it. If they put me in jail, I’ll go on a hunger strike. I’m not doing this. And that’s that. I’m not using the words that other people require me to use. Especially if they’re made up by radical left-wing ideologues.”

But in Peterson’s case, instead of going to jail or being taken to court or being disciplined by his university, Peterson became an overnight sensation.

Attempts to Silence Us Will Backfire

According to his publisher, his second book, “12 Rules for Life has sold over five million copies worldwide and his global book tour has reached more than 250,000 people in 100 different cities.”

His Twitter account now has 1.7 million followers and his YouTube channel has 3.5 million subscribers.

Instead of his voice being silenced, Dr. Peterson’s voice has now been amplified to reach multiplied millions around the globe, providing another graphic example of what can happen when you make a principled decision not to cave in.

I’ve been working on a major book that addresses how we can overcome cancel culture, due out early next year. But suffice it to say now that we should be encouraged by the examples of Sen. Hawley and Prof. Peterson. The more the culture tries to silence us, the more we will get our message out.

We will not be silenced.

Dr. Michael Brown (www.askdrbrown.org) is the host of the nationally syndicated Line of Fire radio program. His latest book is Evangelicals at the Crossroads: Will We Pass the Trump Test? Connect with him on Facebook, Twitter or YouTube.

Filed Under: Articles - World

Ryan Long Thanks Family & Friends For Believing In ‘Crazy’ ‘Jeopardy!’ Dream

June 17, 2022 by humorouz Leave a Comment

39-year-old rideshare driver Ryan Long never could have imagined that appearing on “Jeopardy!” would turn his life around.

His win streak even got the attention of former champion Mattea Roach, who said she’s excited to compete against him in the upcoming 2022 Tournament of Champions.

Shortly after his winning streak came to an end, Ryan talked to “Jeopardy!” producers about what his time on the show meant to him.

Ryan Long Opens Up About Successful ‘Jeopardy!’ Run

“When I first got the call for Jeopardy! I was a different man,” Ryan told “Jeopardy!” producers after his win streak was over.

“I initially applied for the online test in September of 2020,” he explained. “I had worked all spring and summer through the pandemic, but in the fall, I was off from work on medical leave, so I had time on my hands. I had signed up for the test a few times over the years, but there was always some hitch that prevented me from following through.”

“Ultimately, I think it didn’t happen then because I didn’t truly believe that it could happen,” he added, calling it “a pipe dream, the kind of thing that you halfheartedly pursue in your spare time because 1) you don’t really think there’s a chance and 2) you’ve been conditioned to think of life as a series of crushed ambitions, so why bother? (That’s long denied depression for ya. Anyway.)”

“A month later in October, I was contacted for a Zoom audition,” he went on. “I was not the most confident person in the world, but I did it, thinking the whole time, ‘There’s no way they’re ever gonna let my mug on TV.’ Still, I was happy I’d actually tried. At least I could say that. Life went back to normal, I got better, and in early January, I went back to work.”

“Then COVID came knocking,” he said, going on to explain that he almost didn’t survive his struggle with the virus.

Ryan Long Was Hospitalized Due To COVID-19 For Two And A Half Weeks

Ryan explained that he had gotten sick with COVID-19, which landed him two and a half weeks in the hospital.

“I had managed to avoid getting sick the entire previous year, but after a few days back at work, my luck finally ran out. It went bad pretty quickly,” he explained. “I ended up in the hospital for two and a half weeks. Now, like a lot of men, particularly African American men, I don’t like hospitals. I don’t like going to the doctor (although I’m getting better with that). This time though, I didn’t have a choice.”

“The hospital staff brought it home to me pretty quickly that they weren’t sure I’d make it,” he revealed. “I still keep the picture my doctor gave me of my saturated lungs on my phone, as a reminder of how close I came to never seeing my son again. Thankfully, I did recover. The experience taught me not to take anything for granted, and it relit a fire in me that I thought had gone out a long time ago: the fire to do something with my life. I remembered that life wasn’t just about survival; I wanted to actually live and not just ‘get through.’”

“A lot of things happened over the next year which, for the sake of brevity, I’ll spare everybody,” he went on. “Epiphanies fade; life largely went back to the regular routine again, except I couldn’t physically do my job anymore. I tried, and I failed. I started rideshare driving because it was pretty much my only option for making ends meet (which they didn’t, always).”

Ryan said he “made it work as best I could, like everybody does. Being on Jeopardy! was the furthest thing from my mind. And then this past February, I got a phone call…”

Ryan Long Thanks His Family & Friends For Helping Him Realize His ‘Crazy Dream’

Ryan said that, “with the help of friends and family,” that he was able to realize “this crazy dream” of appearing on “Jeopardy!”.

“That fire came back to me yet again; I wanted to do this,” he explained. “For myself, my kid, and for a thousand other reasons, I wanted to do this. I swore I wouldn’t waste the opportunity, so I went out and tried my best.”

“I think I did okay, although I only look back now and see my mistakes. And now, after being on the show, I find it has awakened something else in me,” he shared. “I’ve started to find joy in the possibilities of life again instead of fearing the potential outcomes. I’m still proud of those years when I was grinding and doing whatever it took to survive. But I’ve also been reminded that I still have dreams and ambitions, and that it’s okay to care about myself enough to have them. With the help of a lot of people, I managed to achieve a big one. For that, I am forever grateful.”

Now that his “Jeopardy!” run has come to an end, Ryan doesn’t know what the future has in store for him.

“People keep asking me what my plans might be,” he confused. I don’t know what the future has in store for me, but I do know this: I plan on following the advice of the illustrious Ms. Jill Scott and ‘living my life like it’s golden.’”

“I’ve worn a lot of hats in my years on this planet,” he added. “I started out at 14 with a summer job as a furniture mover. I’ve been a dishwasher, a water ice truck driver, a piano delivery guy, an airport security worker, a supermarket cashier, a bouncer, a street sweeper, a warehouse grunt, a package handler, an office clerk, a CCT operator, a rideshare driver.”

“And now, I’m a 16-game Jeopardy! champion,” he concluded. “How’s that for an entry on the ol’ resumé?”

Fans can’t wait to see Ryan again in the 2022 Tournament of Champions later this year. A 16-game champion is a great title, but the Tournament of Champions winner sounds even better!

Filed Under: Articles - World

‘Neymar & Mbappe are a joke, they are like robots!’ – Panzo reflects on trying to contain PSG stars | Goal.com

June 16, 2022 by humorouz Leave a Comment

Kylian Mbappe and Neymar are “a joke” to play against, says Jonathan Panzo, with the Dijon star admitting that trying to contain the threat posed by two Paris Saint-Germain superstars is akin to “defending against robots”.

Panzo has first-hand experience of facing France and Brazil international forwards in Ligue 1.

A top-flight contest earlier this season saw PSG run out 4-0 winners on the day, with Mbappe stepping off the bench to net two goals in that fixture – with both efforts teed up by Neymar.

Prolific frontmen at Parc des Princes have endured struggles since that outing on October 24, with form and fitness problems holding them back, but their quality remains without question.

Panzo is certainly not relishing another outing against PSG on February 28, with the England U21 international telling Ligue 1’s official website of facing Mbappe and Neymar: “It was a joke. it was like defending against robots. They’re so fast, they’re just so good, it’s so hard to defend, to control.

“Just that experience of playing against that sort of player is good for me.”

Panzo came into very close contact with Neymar during his meeting with PSG, with the South American tangling with him inside the box, but the 28-year-old was looking to have a bit of fun.

London-born Panzo, who joined Dijon from Monaco in the summer of 2020, added: “I’m not quite sure [what he was doing]. I was coming into the box and he just hugged me.

“I said to him, ‘What are you doing?’ He just started laughing. It was a friendly hug… he was defending against me, but I think he was just joking around.”

Panzo spent time within Chelsea’s academy system as a youngster, before joining Monaco in 2018, and is enjoying life in Burgundy after taking on another new challenge in his blossoming career.

He said of his time at Dijon, with a three-year contract committed to upon his arrival: “It’s going well, I’ve got some games under my belt.

“Dijon are a great club, fighting to stay up in Ligue 1. I wanted to help them and get some game time as well.

“I think I’m getting used to a lot of changes, there were a lot of changes at Monaco too. You have to adapt, keep pushing, and work hard to stay in the team.”

Filed Under: Articles - World

Amidst the ongoing fight with Lizzy Anjorin, Femi Adebayo, Joke Silva eulogize and pray for Toyin Abraham – Kemi Filani News

June 16, 2022 by humorouz Leave a Comment

Amidst the ongoing fight between actresses Lizzy Anjorin and Toyin Abraham, Nollywood veterans, Femi Adebayo and Joke Silva have taken to their Instagram page to eulogize and pray for Toyin Abraham.

This comes after Toyin cried out over allegations that Lizzy Anjorin and a socialite on Instagram, Esabod cursed her son and husband.

KFN recalls that Toyin and Lizzy Anjorin have remained sworn enemies over a controversial issue best known to both actresses.

According to Joke in her post on Instagram, Toyin is covered with the blood of Jesus and may she the curses shall not come to pass.

Sharing a photo of Toyin on a movie set, Joke wrote;

“OLUWATOYIN OMO ABRAHAM !!! AYA AJEYEMI !!! MUMMY IRE !!! ACTOR of Life GOD BLESS YOU @toyin_abraham
The curse causless shall not stand. You are covered in the BLOOD of your KING. ON THE SET OF #OGUNDABEDE
(KING OF THIEVES)”

Taking to Joke’s comment section to appreciate her, Toyin wrote;

“Grandma @ajokesilva Thank you so mummy love u with all my heart and this just lifted my spirit more… Eshey ganni mummy mi”

Femi Adebayo on the other hand called for prayers for the ‘Alakada crooner’. According to Femi, Toyin is an amazing actress. In his words;

“OLUWATOYIN OMO ABRAHAM !!! AYA AJEYEMI !!! MUMMY IRE !!! ACTOR AIYE !!! GOD BLESS YOU @toyin_abraham PLEASE GUYS, HELP ME EMBARRASS TOYIN WITH PRAYERS O! STILL ON THE SET OF #OGUNDABEDE (KING OF THIEVES)”

Reacting to this, the mother of one wrote;

“Broda Femi I love u so much and I can’t wait for the world to see it… I miss u and miss our mangoes and fried meat more”

Your email address will not be published.

Fans of Nollywood actress, Toyin Abraham have embarked on a 3 days prayer and fasting for their favourite following her unending fight ith Lizzy Anjorin.

This comes after the fight between these Nollywood stars was revisited and Toyin was forced to react after Lizzy and others allegedly placed huge curses on her son and husband.

According to Toyin, the curses were too much on her family and it’s unfair because she did not do anything to Lizzy to deserve that.

Watch the video below;

Nollywood actress Ify Onwuemene is dead.

Ify Onwuemene died on Tuesday after years of battling endometrial cancer.

Her colleague, Mrs Gloria Young made the announcement in a social media post on Tuesday night.

“With a deep sense of loss but total submission to God Almighty, we regret to announce that IFEY ONWUEMENE has gone to be with the Lord.

“IFEY ONWUEME was diagnosed with endometrial cancer, her womb was removed but she has been battling the ailment for many years now.

“In 2019, even after 8 sessions of chemotherapy, the doctors told her she had reached stage 4.

“However, we are not sure if she was given the wrong diagnosis or…

Actress, Iyabo Ojo has been under the fire for interfering in the ongoing fight between Toyin Abraham and Lizzy Anjorin.

KFN recalls that Lizzy Anjorin revisited her fight with Toyin Abraham after she birthed her child a few weeks ago.

According to Lizzy, Toyin is a bad person and a pretender, but most people don’t know this.

For the first time, Toyin decided to address the issue during a live video session with Iyabo Ojo. The mother of one explained that she does not understand why Lizzy was picking an offence with her and it was getting out of hands because her son and husband were being cursed.

Iyabo Ojo’s facial expressions during the video session have earned her alot of…

Filed Under: Articles - World

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