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Watch: Barstool’s Dave Portnoy goes berserk on “pink-haired, crazy liberals” looking to ban wood-fired pizza

December 2, 2023 by humorouz Leave a Comment

When it was announced that unelected progressive bureaucrats had a scheme to ruin pizza in New York City, you had to know that Dave Portnoy, America’s pizza critic, would be activated. Spoiler: he disagrees with the new rule. And during an emergency press conference, he went off on the pink-haired, crazy liberals who have zeroed in on pizza as the latest thing Americans enjoy that they want to ruin.

“But Brodigan, why do I care about NYC banning pizza?”

For the same reason you need to care about the insane things California comes up with. What starts in NY/CA becomes the latest thing the left supports nationwide. Especially the more they hear people they don’t like disagreeing with it.

\u201cGive us pizza or give us death! #pizza #coalovens\u201d

— Dave Portnoy (@Dave Portnoy)
1687819224

Do you know what’s going on in New York? You’ve got trash in the city. You’ve got rats. You’ve got people getting slashed on the subway. You’ve got flash mobs robbing stores. Can you’re comping for coal-oven pizzerias?

Yep. You would think New York had more important things to deal with, yet herewe are.

Why is NYC banning pizza?

In order to lower NYC’s carbon footprint, the city has decided to target 100 pizzerias that cook using wood-fired or coal-fired ovens, demanding they cut carbon emissions up to 75%. Pizzerias with these ovens made before 2016 will be forced to buy expensive emission control devices while attempting to operate in one of the most expensive cities in America to run a business.

In a statement, NYC DEP spokesman Ted Timbers called this a “common-sense rule” that was developed with restaurant groups and whatever the hell “environmental justice” groups are.

Will NYC voters allow a pizza ban to happen?

Of course, they will. This is what New Yorkers voted for. They may not have realized it. They let themselves get distracted by social issues and in 2022 voted on abortion “rights.” Even though there is more of a chance New York legalizes abortion to the eleventh trimester than place a single restriction on your choice to abort a child. They let New York Democrats distract them with what Ron DeSantis is doing in Florida, the state they’re going to move to as New York gets too expensive and crime-ridden to live in.

Crime, that Kathy Hochul laughed about. And because of predominately New York City voters, they re-elected her governor anyway. Enjoy your gas stoves while you still can.

Radical progressives have made it clear their agenda is to regulate how you live in every aspect of your life. And that they’ll do it through unelected bureaucracy knowing how unpopular their agenda is. New York City voters keep reelecting them then complain about it.

Today it is wood-fired ovens. Next, it’s going to be wood-fired barbeques. Then the left is going to move on to what you cook in your own backyard. This latest New York City regulation is another warning sign of what’s coming next.

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Brodigan is Grand Poobah of this here website and when he isn’t writing words about things enjoys day drinking, pro-wrestling, and country music. You can find him on the Twitter too.

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