Members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, commonly known as Mormons, are a conservative group who aren’t known for being vocal about sex.
But best selling author, blogger, and mother of six, Gabrielle Blair, has kicked that stereotype to the curb with a pointed thread on reducing unwanted pregnancies. And her sights are set directly at men.
She wrote a Cliff’s Notes version of her thread on her blog:
If you want to stop abortion, you need to prevent unwanted pregnancies. And men are 100% responsible for unwanted pregnancies. No for real, they are. Perhaps you are thinking: IT TAKES TWO! And yes, it does take two for _intentional_ pregnancies.
But ALL unwanted pregnancies are caused by the irresponsible ejaculations of men. Period. Don’t believe me? Let me walk you through it. Let’s start with this: women can only get pregnant about 2 days each month. And that’s for a limited number of years.
Here’s the whole thread. It’s long, but totally worth the read.
I’m a mother of six, and a Mormon. I have a good understanding of arguments surrounding abortion, religious and otherwise. I’ve been listening to men grandstand about women’s reproductive rights, and I’m convinced men actually have zero interest in stopping abortion. Here’s why…
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
If you want to stop abortion, you need to prevent unwanted pregnancies. And men are 100% responsible for unwanted pregnancies. No for real, they are. Perhaps you are thinking: IT TAKES TWO! And yes, it does take two for _intentional_ pregnancies.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
But ALL unwanted pregnancies are caused by the irresponsible ejaculations of men. Period. Don’t believe me? Let me walk you through it. Let’s start with this: women can only get pregnant about 2 days each month. And that’s for a limited number of years.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
That makes 24 days a year a women might get pregnant. But men can _cause_ pregnancy 365 days a year. In fact, if you’re a man who ejaculates multiple times a day, you could cause multiple pregnancies daily. In theory a man could cause 1000+ unwanted pregnancies in just one year.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
And though their sperm gets crappier as they age, men can cause unwanted pregnancies from puberty till death. So just starting with basic biology + the calendar it’s easy to see men are the issue here.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
But what about birth control? If a woman doesn’t want to risk an unwanted pregnancy, why wouldn’t she just use birth control? If a women can manage to figure out how to get an abortion, surely she can get birth control, right? Great questions.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
Modern birth control is possibly the greatest invention of the last century, and I am very grateful for it. It’s also brutal. The side effects for many women are ridiculously harmful. So ridiculous, that when an oral contraception for men was created, it wasn’t approved…
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
… because of the side effects. And the list of side effects was about 1/3 as long as the known side effects for women’s oral contraception. https://t.co/SA9oZQD6i8
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
There’s a lot to be unpacked just in that story, but I’ll simply point out (in case you didn’t know) that as a society, we really don’t mind if women suffer, physically or mentally, as long as it makes things easier for men.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
But good news, Men: Even with the horrible side effects, women are still very willing to use birth control. Unfortunately it’s harder to get than it should be. Birth control options for women require a doctor’s appointment and a prescription. It’s not free, and often not cheap.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
In fact there are many people trying to make it more expensive by fighting to make sure insurance companies refuse to cover it. Oral contraceptives for women can’t be acquired easily, or at the last minute. And they don’t work instantly.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
If we’re talking about the pill, it requires consistent daily use and doesn’t leave much room for mistakes, forgetfulness, or unexpected disruptions to daily schedules. And again, the side effects can be brutal. I’M STILL GRATEFUL FOR IT PLEASE DON’T TAKE IT AWAY.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
I’m just saying women’s birth control isn’t simple or easy. In contrast, let’s look at birth control for men, meaning condoms. Condoms are readily available at all hours, inexpensive, convenient, and don’t require a prescription. They’re effective, and work on demand, instantly.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
Men can keep them stocked up just in case, so they’re always prepared. Amazing! They are so much easier than birth control options for women. As a bonus, in general, women love when men use condoms. They keep us from getting STDs, they don’t lessen our pleasure during sex…
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
… or prevent us from climaxing. And the best part? Clean up is so much easier — no waddling to the toilet as your jizz drips down our legs. So why in the world are there ever unwanted pregnancies? Why don’t men just use condoms every time they have sex? Seems so simple, right?
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
Oh. I remember. Men _don’t_ love condoms. In fact, men frequently pressure women to have sex without a condom. And it’s not unheard of for men to remove the condom during sex, without the women’s permission or knowledge. (Pro-tip: That’s assault.) https://t.co/c2HHjkbx6G
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
Why would men want to have sex without a condom? Good question. Apparently it’s because for the minutes they are penetrating their partner, having no condom on gives the experience more pleasure.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
So… there are men willing to risk getting a woman pregnant — which means literally risking her life, her health, her social status, her relationships, and her career, so that they can experience a few minutes of _slightly_ more pleasure? Is that for real? Yes. Yes it is.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
What are we talking about here pleasure-wise? If there’s a pleasure scale, with pain beginning at zero and going down into the negatives, a back-scratch falling at 5, and an orgasm without a condom being a 10, where would sex _with_ a condom fall? Like a 7 or 8?
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
So it’s not like sex with a condom is _not_ pleasurable, it’s just not _as_ pleasurable. An 8 instead of a 10. Let me emphasize that again: Men regularly choose to put women at massive risk by having non-condom sex, in order to experience a few minutes of slightly more pleasure.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
Now keep in mind, for the truly condom-averse, men also have a non-condom, always-ready birth control built right in, called the pull out. It’s not perfect, and it’s a favorite joke, but it is also 96% effective. https://t.co/WnpSadRtRs
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
So surely, we can expect men who aren’t wearing a condom to at least pull out every time they have sex, right?
Nope.
And why not?
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
Well, again, apparently it’s _slightly_ more pleasurable to climax inside a vagina than, say, on their partner’s stomach. So men are willing to risk the life, health and well-being of women, in order to experience a tiny bit more pleasure for like 5 seconds during orgasm.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
It’s mind-boggling and disturbing when you realize that’s the choice men are making. And honestly, I’m not as mad as I should be about this, because we’ve trained men from birth that their pleasure is of utmost importance in the world. (And to dis-associate sex and pregnancy.)
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
While we’re here, let’s talk a bit more about pleasure and biology. Did you know that a man CAN’T get a woman pregnant without having an orgasm? Which means that we can conclude getting a woman pregnant is a pleasurable act for men.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
But did you further know that men CAN get a woman pregnant without HER feeling any pleasure at all? In fact, it’s totally possible for a man to impregnate a woman even while causing her excruciating pain, trauma or horror.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
In contrast, a woman can have non-stop orgasms with or without a partner and never once get herself pregnant. A woman’s orgasm has literally nothing to do with pregnancy or fertility — her clitoris exists not for creating new babies, but simply for pleasure.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
No matter how many orgasms she has, they won’t make her pregnant. Pregnancies can only happen when men have an orgasm. Unwanted pregnancies can only happen when men orgasm irresponsibly.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
What this means is a women can be the sluttliest slut in the entire world who loves having orgasms all day long and all night long and she will never find herself with an unwanted pregnancy unless a man shows up and ejaculates irresponsibly.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
Women enjoying sex does not equal unwanted pregnancy and abortion. Men enjoying sex and having irresponsible ejaculations is what causes unwanted pregnancies and abortion.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
Let’s talk more about responsibility. Men often don’t know, and don’t ask, and don’t think to ask, if they’ve caused a pregnancy. They may never think of it, or associate sex with making babies at all. Why? Because there are 0 consequences for men who cause unwanted pregnancies.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
If the woman decides to have an abortion, the man may never know he caused an unwanted pregnancy with his irresponsible ejaculation.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 13, 2018
Blair’s controversial tweet storm have been liked hundreds of thousands of time, with the original tweet earning nearly 200,000 likes since it was posted on Thursday, September, 13.
The reactions have earned her both praise and scorn.
Most of the scorn was from men.
Men AND women both need to take responsibility for their own actions. I’ve said that many times. To say otherwise just isn’t being realistic.
— David (@spiritofvincenn) September 16, 2018
You had me until you said men are 100% responsible. We aren’t. We are 50% responsible, excluding rape which needs to be regarded differently obv. As soon as men are blamed 100% we switch off as you sound like one of those raging anti-men types. Sorry.
— Jarrod Parker (@JarrodParker) September 16, 2018
But Blair wouldn’t budge.
You are incorrect. A woman having an orgasm while with a man risks nothing and hurts no one. A man having an orgasm while with a woman risks her life. A dick without a condim is a dangerous thing and has killed more people in human history than any war or weapon.
— Gabrielle Blair (@designmom) September 16, 2018
For other men, the tweet thread was a real eye-opener.
Hi there. This has really resonated with me. I am strongly pro-choice, but – shamefully – hadn’t thought it through until I read this thread. And you’re right: male organisms are responsible. We are harming those people whom we profess to love. It’s systematic and it’s wrong.
— Adam Rutland (@Adam_Rutland) September 16, 2018
I just want you to know from a guy that your entire line of argument on this thread is 100% accurate. Thanks for taking the time to put this out there. Every adult in this country SHOULD read this.
— Jarrod Broussard (@jarrodbroussard) September 18, 2018
Women everywhere applauded Blair’s bold thread.
Thank God for this. I have had so many arguments with men over the years about their part of responsibility for pregnancy. The phrase “she got pregnant” sends me to the moon! Blessings to you Gabrielle!
— Terri Lyons (@calrho) September 17, 2018
Pulitzer, Nobel, everything else. You deserve the whole lot!
— Sally (@MillyMcMophead) September 18, 2018
