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Tuesday’s Top 32 Funny Twitter Quotes

August 29, 2022 by humorouz Leave a Comment

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Filed Under: Articles - World

Cristiano Ronaldo branded “crazy” and Jose Mourinho “abnormal” in brutal leaked audio – Mirror Online

August 29, 2022 by humorouz Leave a Comment

Real Madrid president Florentino Perez has landed himself in hot water for the third time in a matter of months after leaked audio recordings emerged of him slating Cristiano Ronaldo and Jose Mourinho.

Another old audio clip released this week depicted Perez referring to Madrid legends Raul and Iker Casillas as “great frauds”, that Raul was “destroying Madrid” and that Casillas was only ever picked by Madrid because he was popular with the fanbase.

Perez is now alleged to have launched into an experlative-filled rant at club icon Ronaldo, while tearing into his agent Jorge Mendes and former Madrid boss Mourinho.

These comments come just months after Perez was at the forefront of the ill-fated ‘The European Super League’, a breakaway competition designed to give Madrid and the other founding clubs more financial security.

Now, the controversial club president has been caught on audio recording speaking about Ronaldo, who is Madrid’s all-time record goalscorer with 450 goals in all competitions, as “an idiot”.

Perez is alleged to have said of Ronaldo, via Marca: “He’s crazy. This guy is an idiot, a sick man.

“You think this guy is normal, but he’s not normal, otherwise, he wouldn’t do all the things he does.

“The last nonsense he did, that he saw all the time… Why do you think he does that stupid thing?”

Perez’s verbal onslaught didn’t end there, however, as he also tore into Mendes, who is the agent of both Ronaldo and Mourinho.

The two aren’t believed to see eye to eye, judging by Perez’s comments.

The Madrid president claimed Mendes and Mourinho both have “terrible egos” and could make “much more money” if they didn’t.

“Mendes does not command anything in him. Just as he does not command anything in Mourinho,” Perez said.

“Zero patatero. Even for the interviews. Nothing. No f*****g case.

“These are guys with a terrible ego, both spoiled, the coach and him, and they don’t see reality, because both of them could earn much more money if they were otherwise.

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“These are two abnormal, because we are talking about a lot of money in the field of image rights.

“Also, with that face that they have, with that challenging way, that everyone dislikes them… If the publicity is the opposite, it is the opposite!”.

The context of Perez’s quotes is currently unknown, but the Madrid chief came out swinging in his response and claimed the leaks had come about due to his involvement in the European Super League.

Perez argued that there was no context attributed to his quotes, which he claims were secretly recorded without his knowledge.

His statement read: “The published quotes were part of conversations secretly recorded by Mr. José Antonio Abellán, who has been trying to sell the recordings for many years without any success.

“I find it surprising that they have been published today by El Confidencial, despite the time that has elapsed.

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YOAN VALAT/EPA-EFE/REX/Shutterstock)

“They are isolated quotes that were part of conversations and have been taken out of the wider context in which they were made.

“I understand that the fact that they have been published now, so many years on from the time the conversations took place, owes to my involvement as one of the driving forces behind the Super League.

“I have placed the matter in the hands of my lawyers, who are examining the course of action to be taken.”

Filed Under: Articles - World

Elephant rips handler in half after ‘going crazy’ in heat as it was made to haul wood in Thailand | Daily Mail Online

August 28, 2022 by humorouz Leave a Comment

An elephant has ripped its handler in half after it was forced to haul wood from a plantation during a heatwave in Thailand.

The male elephant, named Pom Pam, stabbed Supachai Wongfaed, 33, with its tusks several times and ripped his body in half after ‘going crazy’ in the heat, police said. 

The 20-year-old elephant had been hauling rubberwood from a plantation in the hot weather, where temperatures reached 89 degrees Fahrenheit (31C), in southern Thailand’s Phang Nga province for four days when it turned on its handler. 

Police officers and rescue workers were called to the scene on August 17 where they found Wongfaed’s body ripped in two in a pool of blood. 

The male elephant, named Pom Pam, stabbed Supachai Wongfaed, 33, with its tusks several times and ripped his body in half (pictured) after ‘going crazy’ in the heat, police said

The 20-year-old elephant had been hauling rubberwood from a plantation in the hot weather, where temperatures reached 89 degrees Fahrenheit (31C), in southern Thailand’s Phang Nga province for four days when it turned on its handler (file image) 

Livestock officers and volunteers searched for the elephant and found him around 500 yards away from Wongfaed’s body.

They then shot Pom Pam with a sedative dart from a range of around 550 yards so that rescue workers could retrieve the handler’s body. 

The livestock offers later transported the elephant to their facility for rehabilitation. 

Asian elephants are sometimes used to carry logs and woods in forested areas of Thailand, despite a 30-year-old law banning the practice. 

Takua Thung police Lieutenant Colonel Sorasak Chandee said: ‘We were called to the scene at a rubber plantation where we found the dead body of a mahout.

‘The elephant owner was attacked and killed by his animal. The elephant was aggressive when we found it. We suspect her was irritable and attacked his caretaker.’

Wonfaed’s father is Thawon Wongfaed, the former mayor of the Khok Charoen subdistrict in central Thailand. His body has been taken to relatives for his funeral.

Elephants are sometimes used to carry logs and woods in forested areas of Thailand, despite a 30-year-old law banning the practice (stock image) 

Last month, another handler was killed by his elephant at a rubberwood plantation in Chawang district, southern Thailand

Chaichana Matchimwong was found dead by police with multiple tusk wounds after he made the elephant carry heavy logs along a road, reports the Bangkok Post.

Elephant Phlai Ekasit (pictured) killed his 54-year-old owner at a Thai zoo in 2017 by crushing him to death with his trunk

In 2017, a famous Thai elephant who starred in films and adverts crushed his handler to death at a zoo in Thailand. 

Somsak Riangngern, 54, was killed at Chiang Mai Zoo by a 32-year-old male elephant named Phlai Ekasit.

Mr Riangngern had fed Phlai and unchained him so he could bathe and drink when the attack happened. As Mr Riangngern was walking away from the elephant when the animal struck him with its trunk and tusks before grabbing him with its trunk.

Ekasit is well known in Thailand having starred in five films including the popular Ong Bak series starring martial arts expert Tony Jaa. 

Ekasit had reportedly been performing in shows for tourists, though Wuthichai denied this, saying the zoo only allows tourists to feed the animals.

Thailand is notorious for an elephant tourism trade that sees the animals performing in circuses, giving rides, or hired out for other forms of entertainment.

Animal rights group PETA said that elephants working in captivity ‘have been torn from their jungle homes to be sold like equipment’. The group says they are ‘forced to haul illegal logs or entertain tourists’.

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Elephant rips handler in half after ‘going crazy’ in heat as it was made to haul wood in Thailand

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Filed Under: Articles - World

Casemiro receives funny X-rated text from Real Madrid star’s girlfriend after Man Utd move – Mirror Online

August 28, 2022 by humorouz Leave a Comment

Casemiro received an expletive Whatsapp message from the partner of his Real Madrid teammate Fede Valverde, pleading with him not to join Manchester United.

The Brazilian international’s move to Old Trafford was confirmed on Friday evening as United paid an initial fee of £60million plus a further £10m in potential add-ons. United had made a deal for the Madrid star their prime focus after their move for Adrien Rabiot of Juventus broke down while Frenkie de Jong is still a Barcelona player.

Casemiro has become the fourth signing of the summer at United under new boss Erik ten Hag and they are hopeful the signing of the Brazilian will spark a late influx of arrivals. Defenders Lisandro Martinez and Tyrell Malacia joined from Ajax and Feyenoord respectively, while Christian Eriksen arrived as a free agent after his Brentford contract expired.

Casemiro, 30, received an expletive message from Mina Bonino, the partner of Real Madrid midfielder Valverde. Bonino sent a screenshot of the Whatsapp message she sent to the Brazilian on Friday, which turned out to be in vain – as the player already had his heart set on a switch to Old Trafford.

Bonino wrote, in a message to Casemiro: that was firmly tongue-in-cheek but also reflected the frustration of the Spanish club of their star asset departing: “Gil de mierda! No te vayas” (which translates into English as “don’t go, you s*** a*****e”).

Casemiro had won three La Liga titles and five Champions League crowns across a glorious stint in the Spanish capital, forming a formidable midfield trio alongside Luka Modric and Toni Kroos. The emergence of Valverde, coupled with the signings of Eduardo Camavinga and Aurelien Tchouameni – who is viewed as Casemiro’s long-term replacement – had ramped up the competition for places.

Have Your Say! Is Casemiro the perfect signing for Man Utd’s midfield? Tell us what you think here.

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Helios de la Rubia/Real Madrid via Getty Images)

United are hopeful of at least two more additions in the closing weeks of the summer transfer window. A £67million offer has been lodged for Ajax forward Antony, although this has been knocked back by the Dutch giants. PSV Eindhoven’s Cody Gakpo is an attacking alternative.

The club are also hopeful of signing a new goalkeeper to provide competition to the out-of-form David De Gea while they are also hopeful of adding a new right-back, although that is tied into the future of Aaron Wan-Bissaka – who may complete a return to Crystal Palace this summer.

Filed Under: Articles - World

This Instagram Page Shares 130 People That Decided To Ink Themselves With Crazy Tattoos

August 27, 2022 by humorouz Leave a Comment

The world is full of some seriously talented and dedicated artists. Today, we’re taking a deep dive into the world of ink and looking at some of the most impressive tattoo designs, as shared on the ‘Crazyy Tattoos’ (yup, with two y’s) Instagram page.

A page with a jaw-dropping following of 1.1 million people, ‘Crazyy Tattoos’ celebrates the best of the best and the weirdest of the weirdest. The details are incredible, and they’re seriously inspirational no matter if you’re inked up to your eyeballs or you prefer just looking at awesome designs from afar. If these won’t make you say ‘Whoa!’ like Neo from The Matrix, we don’t know what will.

As you’re upvoting your favorite designs, have a think about which of these pics wowed you the most, and let us know about it in the comments. Meanwhile, if you’re feeling up to sharing, tell us all about how you got your first tattoos, Pandas.

Meanwhile, check out Bored Panda’s interview about tattoos with artist David McKinlay, the owner of the Archangel 1608 Tattoo Studio in Glasgow, Scotland. He told us about what happens to ink as time goes by and why artists need to think weeks in advance when adding minute details to their designs.

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David, the tattoo artist running the Archangel 1608 Tattoo Studio, told Bored Panda that the quality of a tattoo really depends “on the skill of the artist, with the equipment a very close second.”

“As tattooing is big business now, so is supplying tattooists with equipment. This means there are more companies than ever competing for our business, and having to refine and improve the quality of their products to be competitive,” he told us.

“It’s really hard to get a lot of minute detail into a tattoo, and for the tattoo to keep that detail over time.”

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According to the tattoo master, as tattoos age, the lines will spread out and thicken. That means that, eventually, no matter how great a tattoo initially is, it won’t be as sharp and crisp as it once was. Time marches on.

“This is the sign of a great tattooist— knowing just how much detail to put in, with the finest needles, that will last the test of time. Unfortunately, we see a lot of work now—micro portraits mainly—that will only look good for a few weeks, then like mush forever after,” he warned.

David said that with the high-quality inks that are available nowadays, they’ll last infinitely longer than older inks. “Generally, a good tattoo won’t need to be touched up for at least 20-25 years, if at all.”

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Unfortunately, not everyone gives tattoo artists the respect and recognition they deserve. The key is in the name: they’re artists, and what they do really is art. Their creativity, their dedication to their craft can be phenomenal.

All the while, you have to keep in mind that they’re inking a real live human being, not just painting designs on paper or pixels. It takes nerves of steel, as well as imagination and patience to create the best designs. Designs that end up being shared and reshared on social media around the globe, for years to come.

During a couple of earlier interviews with tattoo master David, the mastermind behind the Archangel 1608 Tattoo Studio in Glasgow, Bored Panda learned a lot about the craft of tattoo artists. We also got a peek into the relationship these artists build with their clients.

David told Bored Panda that tattooists can practice on any number of things “to help them get the mechanics and techniques to tattoo properly.”

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“You can buy synthetic skin, pig skin from a butcher’s, or even use fruit, such as oranges or lemons, bananas,” the tattoo artist shared with Bored Panda.

Eventually, however, you’ll have to move on to inking real people. According to David, there is “no substitute for moving, breathing, sweating, bleeding human skin.” Oranges and pig skin, while good for some initial practice, aren’t the real thing. Once you’ve got the fundamentals down, it’s time to hone your craft further.

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Some tattooists choose to do their very first designs on themselves. David, from Glasgow, is one of them.

“The first 4 or 5 tattoos I ever did were on myself. It was a pretty severe learning curve, but I had to prove that I wanted the apprenticeship, and it let me see how the tattoos would heal up, and what I could do better,” he shared just how dedicated he is to his craft.

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“You shouldn’t really be tattooing actual clients for a long time, but if you can persuade friends to let you once you’re ready, that’s great,” he added.

“Tattooing is a craft, a skill, and should be taught directly from one person to another,” David, the founder of Archangel 1608, told Bored Panda. In his opinion, tattooing isn’t something that you should learn from “a YouTube video or a bs tattoo ‘school’ that only cares about your money.”

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According to David, in their tattoo studio, they have a rule that if a customer isn’t 100% confident about the design, they won’t do it.

“We’ll try to offer a compromise, but if the client is too rigid, we’ll point them in the direction of another artist. The client is only right in terms of what they like, not how the tattoo can actually be done or will end up looking,” he told us.

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A while back, David told us about another side of the artist-client dynamic. While most customers are great people, there are some bad apples here and there. Some folks simply don’t understand that what tattooists do requires a lot of time, effort, and experience.

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“We do get people asking for discounts, but it’s not as common as it was. I think we’ve a reputation now for not taking nonsense,” he said that some industry professionals generally tend to get more customers asking for discounts. For instance, bakers and hairdressers get these requests more often than others.

“It’s insulting though. These people trying to barter certainly don’t go into their supermarket or travel agent and try to get the price down,” the tattoo artist said.

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Fresh Vs Healed.

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David said that he’s run into some rude clients who don’t respect the artists’ time and think that “it’s ok if people cancel last minute, or fail to turn up, as they think we can just do some drawings to fill our time, when we should be earning money.”

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In his view, people really need to call out rude customers instead of ignoring them. “In the last couple of years, there’s been a rise in entitled, over-bearing, and spoilt attitudes from a certain minority that think the sun revolves around them… when it doesn’t! It shines out your tattooist’s butt!” the Scot joked.

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